January 29, 2017

An Open letter from D-I-L to her would be In-laws (Modern Nari)

Dear Strange people,

As euphoric as I may feel right now, I am excited too, for I have so many plans. Getting married has been one of my dreams and now that it is materializing I am experiencing the joys of the spring. There are things that are troubling me like how will your son and I manage our finances, where will we live after marriage, what will happen if one of us gets a transfer and plenty other. But let us not get to that; let us cross the bridge when we come to it. How are the preparations going on at your end?

I have just known your son for a few days and I am apprehensive about his taste, distaste, likes and dislikes. But that is not a reason to worry, for I will have you by my side. And with time, I will get to know him better. There have been people at my workplace, who were once a stranger and are now good friends.  My married friends told me that I would no longer be that young free girl who once had the freedom to meet her friends, catch a movie or so and then head for eating ‘Golgappe’. But trust me, I am not going to walk the blind alleyway. I have my own life and I believe that life for both of us would be better if we ‘be’ ourselves. I understand that my new life would bring many responsibilities along with it and that it will take a lot of patience and understanding to get used to it. On the same lines, I am also hoping that your son does not turn out to be a male chauvinist and that he knows where not to cross the line. I would really appreciate if he acknowledges my presence and respects me the same way as he would like me to respect him.

Won’t it be better if I brief you all about certain things which I do not plan on changing? Number one is my sleep- I love to sleep and I will definitely sleep till late on the weekends. After working five days a week, I deserve two days’ rest. Your son, when we first met, outlined the schedule the DILs follow in the house. It was something I had never done and my mom says that I will start liking it once I get married. But I have a different idea in mind and am obdurate on implementing it. I would rather prefer not getting married than to impress the whole family by waking up early and completing the household chores. Since your son is also earning well, I expect you to get a maid and leave the chores on her.

Clothes should not be a problem as I already spoke about this to your son; I have my own set of dresses for the different occasion and I will not entertain anybody interfering with my dress sense. Also, it would be better if you all employ a cook beforehand, for neither I know how to cook nor am I planning to learn the skill. I will not like it if the relatives will badger me into doing something I don’t like.  

I love to travel; I like binge drinking and I like to party on Fridays. I was not born to pay the bills and impress people around me, right? So why not live the short life to the fullest! I have dated boys before and I expect you all to let the bygones be bygones. Do not force me to quit working ever, because the more you all will get on my nerves, the more audacious I will become.

I do not expect that I and your son share the same interests. In fact, I am more than willing to listen to his corporate narrations and simultaneously expect him to be all ears when I talk about my editing job.

Honestly, there is nothing vexing me more than the long leave for which I have applied. I am confident enough that I will manage things and hopeful too that you all will be my pillars of strength. I am ready to build bridges but if anyone tries to breathe down my neck, I can be a real pain in the *** too. Looking forward to seeing you all on the D-day. 

Till then,

Your would-be DIL

**Do share in the comments sections how you think the letter would have changed for the traditional bahu and get a chance to win a paperback of 'An Eye for an Eye' by HBB.

Also read An Open Letter from D-I-L to her would be In-laws (adarsh bahu).

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